Silence Of Motivational Speakers. What They Won't Tell You Before Buying A Training - Self-development

Recently I had a chance to communicate with a person who can be called a “victim of motivational training”. He is a little over 30, graduated from a prestigious university, got a job in a reputable corporation. It seemed that there was a cloudless career ahead, but unfortunately the direct manager turned out to be a fan of motivational speakers and business events, mostly “inspiring and guiding”. All subordinates in a voluntary-compulsory manner also had to take part in them

At first everything was good: incendiary speakers, among whom there are many world celebrities, uttered wise truths, inspired faith in themselves, suggested recipes for life and professional success. But the main effect of their performances was euphoria; an explosive mixture of positive emotions, under the influence of which it seemed that any goals are achievable, all problems can be solved, and in general - the sea is knee-deep!

Motivation overflowed

In the wake of this energy, great goals were set, daily labor feats were accomplished. It took a lot of energy to live “right”, “right”, that is, as taught by those same “motivational gurus”.

But after a while he felt that he was tired. He began to get used to incendiary speeches, the euphoria faded away faster, but he constantly had a feeling that he could not cope. It seems that he is motivated, and tries, and makes maximum efforts, but there are no special breakthroughs in life. And living “as it should” in practice turned out to be much more difficult than the motivational speakers promised.

As a result: asthenization, depression, disappointment in oneself, and in motivational trainings; is treated by a psychiatrist, visits a psychotherapist.

I am sure that the described case is far from the only one. I am sure that someday the society will grow to a strict examination and licensing of "motivational activities". In the meantime, this is a dubious commercial product, the risks of which are carefully hushed up. What are the "motivational gurus" hiding from their followers?

What will you hear before starting from motivational speakers

1. Lie about yourself. Every motivator guru is necessarily a bright charismatic; has an unusual destiny, endowed with special talents, has achieved outstanding success. But few consider that the personality and destiny of the "guru" is a carefully constructed marketing legend. In this legend, some of the information may be true; part of a half-truth based on exaggeration and distortion; and part of it lies. Even if the biography of the "guru" has a minimum of distortions, it is extremely difficult to check the objectivity of his "successful success".
2. Lies about affordable success. Charisma (emotionality, sociability, charm) is needed by a “guru” in order to reduce the psychological distance between himself and the audience: “I am the same as you! If I succeed, then you can too! " This is cheating, because success factors are always individual (see the text on “survivor's mistake”). And it also contradicts clause 1 about "an unusual person with unique abilities."
3. Lies about motivation. In fact, "gurus" do not know anything about motivation in the scientific sense of the term. Most often, under the guise of “motivation,” they sell an emotional state; a kind of inoculation of optimism and self-confidence, based on abstract or irrational arguments: "You will succeed because the Universe loves you!" Even if this state has motivational potential, it is the so-called extrinsic motivation, which disappears extremely quickly if there is no one with a carrot or a whip nearby. True motivation is always internal. And every person always has it, except that one must be able to be aware of it and manage it. But this skill is subtle, intimate, and has little to do with what is taught in traditional "motivational training".

   The only motivation that is effectively created on them is the desire to attend all new motivational trainings

4. Lies about "simple" rules / laws / secrets of success. This is a consequence of point 2: each “guru” offers his own “authoring system” that will allow everyone to remain motivated and achieve success. "Systems" can range from completely irrational (in the style of "visualize your desire and release into space") to quite reasonable (for example, in the form of "rigid self-discipline" using proven methods of time management and self-organization). The trouble with “motivational gurus” is that they try to simplify and shorten even relatively reasonable ideas as much as possible. But to those who are imbued with their charisma, even 2-3 banal recommendations seem to be a great revelation, in accordance with which they are trying to rebuild themselves and their lives. Following "simple rules" turns into an obsessive ritual, which can be harmful if it is at odds with your individual strategies for success (p.2) and intrinsic motivation (item 3).

And the last … No motivation ?! (Further I would like to quote the well-known continuation of this phrase, said by the designer Artemy Lebedev, but I will not). But in fact, there is always motivation (some kind), this option of the human psyche is always on by default. It turns out that “there is no motivation” is a situation when our internal genuine motivation does not coincide with the external, with the demands from the outside, with the words of motivational speakers. And then what? Go to motivational training, where we will be taught to want what "we need"? Who needs?