How To Conduct Email Correspondence With The Chosen One. Flirting On The Internet - Relations

This often happens in real and virtual life - some men like, and others are attracted! What is the reason? We will discuss and solve this problem using the example of one of the heroines of my program - Julia. She is 32 years old, she is a psychologist from Chelyabinsk. Leads an active lifestyle, does yoga, loves travel. He meets young people on social networks. Believes that men only see her as a mistress. She came to me with a question: "How to behave in order to get married?"

According to her, she has a lot of fans. But for some reason the wrong men are attracted. For example, she liked one, she gave her phone number, offered to meet, he agreed, but suddenly disappeared. And the other, who did not like her, begins to literally pursue her and "get" her in all ways. Julia does not understand: what is she doing wrong, attracting the attention of unwanted gentlemen from the Web?

This question torments most girls. It would seem that they are beautiful and interesting, men fall for their data. And then interest is lost. In addition to external data, what else does a girl need to have? I invited my heroine to act out a scene where I will play the role of a man who appeals to her. We seem to live in different cities, so we will get acquainted by correspondence on social networks. (The letter "M" denotes a Man, and the letter "U" - Julia).

DIALOGUE 1.

M. - Hello!

Yu - Hi!

M. - Beautiful photos!

Yu. - Thank you!

M. - How is your mood?

Yu. - Excellent.

M. - What city are you from?

Yu. - Chelyabinsk.

M. - What are you doing?

Yu. - I'm working at the moment. What do you do?

M. - Yes, little things. Business.

Yu. - At work now?

M. - Business is already working for me. I rest.

Yu. - Great!

M. - How do you like to spend your free time?

Yu. - I like to walk in nature, relax, travel.

M. - Why doesn't such a beautiful girl have a man?

Yu. - Because I'm looking for the best man.

M. - Me?

Yu. - Perhaps you.

M. - Let's go somewhere?

Yu. - Great idea.

M. - Where? What are your preferences?

Yu. - We can have dinner at the restaurant.

M. - Good. We'll call you and write.

Yu. - Leave your phone number?

M. - I'll write to you.

All. End of the story. THE PROBLEM OF HEROINE: when communicating, she does not show initiative and interest in the personality of a virtual acquaintance - this keeps the man from continuing his acquaintance.

I told Julia what she was doing wrong and how best to build a conversation: “When you communicate with a man, you do not create in him a desire to communicate with you further.

When you talk to him, you are simply answering questions. You are not trying to pique his curiosity, although you yourself are an interesting girl. Your presentation is worse than you really are. It feels like you are wearing a mask. And the man also puts on a mask. He is not interested in communicating with you.

Every word you say is like putting it on a scale. Either you encourage interest, or, conversely, reduce it. When a boyfriend asks you questions, you need to at least balance the odds in order to appear interesting. You need to be able to captivate.

And every time you do something or say something, you should at least one step closer to victory so that the man considers the relationship with you as long-term. It is not enough to just have beauty, grace, you need to be able to flirt - then the young man will be at your feet.

Let's repeat the same dialogue under my instructions. She replied “hello” to the greeting. This is mistake. No investment has been made. In response to his flattering remark “a beautiful photo”, Yulia only thanked him. And she needed to demonstrate her intellectual rating (I will talk about ratings at the end of the book. - PR). It was necessary to answer in such a way that the man would want to ask a question on this topic, and not think in panic - how else can you keep the conversation going? Thus, she puts the man in an awkward position, and he experiences discomfort. Therefore, after talking with her, he escaped, closing the computer.

With every question she only pushed the man away. Especially when she started to find out what he was doing. And the interlocutor was no longer interested in talking, because the conversation began to take the form of an interrogation. Maybe he didn't even want to talk about his work yet, because he was not carried away by the girl.

We must learn to create interest! I offered Julia a second experiment, during which I would suggest her answer options. And she will choose whichever one seems correct to her, or offer her own version. Her goal is to show her intelligence so that successful men are interested in her. After all, if a man does not pay attention to your intellectual data, then you understand why he is considering you …

DIALOGUE 2.

M. - Hello!

(You can answer: hello, are we familiar?)

Yu. - Hello, are you my secret admirer?

(Great, Julia! The man is already interested, an intrigue is being created. He is already starting to get involved in the game.)

M. - Do you want to meet?

Yu. - Do you think you have a chance to meet?

(A man will think: "Oh! What a woman … Nobody

will not say - no chance! The answer is yes!)

M. - Yes.

Yu. - How do you assess these chances?

(That's it! He got into the game. You can compliment him if he answers something. For example, “you seem to be a very confident man.” An interesting conversation started.

Then, you don't immediately meet the first person you meet, both on the street and on the Internet! What can you do? Write: “Before answering you, I will first look at your photos. I'll write to you in 10 minutes."

And after 10 minutes write: "I will forgive you for a couple of indecent photographs or I will think to forgive you if you take them away." This is how you demonstrate your confidence and intelligence. And a successful man will love it. And the losers won't try to be better. They will be eliminated immediately. And if a successful man is eliminated, it is because he has a choice. It's not enough to be beautiful today, you also need to be interesting in all respects. Go ahead.)

M. - Beautiful photos.

(It is necessary to answer somehow creatively).

Yu. - Yes, I completely agree with you.

(Okay, show your confidence. Since you are getting to know each other via the Internet, you can also add: “You haven’t seen me live yet!” With these words, Yulia begins to smile, energy has gone from her. And so she will go with a man! Who will leave such women? He will be interested in her!)

M. - How is your mood?

Yu - Today is the best day in my life!

M. - Why?

Yu. - Because you wrote to me.

(Yes! Applause! We must not wait for men to make the conversation interesting. Your date and acquaintance must be saturated with bright colors right now.)

M. - What city are you from?

(Here you can also answer interestingly. For example:

"One of the most famous cities on Earth, which even meteorites don't take!" Let him guess, think, remember that on February 15, 2013, the superbolide collapsed in the vicinity of Chelyabinsk at an altitude of 15-25 km.)

Yu. - From the best city on the planet, where meteorites sometimes fly.

M. - What are you doing?

Yu. - I am facing a difficult choice.

M. - What?

(If you wanted to increase your marriage rating, what would you say to him?)

Yu. - I really want to talk to you, and at the same time they are already waiting for me, I have to run.

(Good! You increase your value in his eyes. You can say: "Difficult choice - with whom to go on a date? Maybe you can advise me something?" He will say: "Come with me!" If he does not believe in his own strength, then he will say: "Wow, what a woman. I will not pull her." And if your interlocutor is a leader, a successful man, then he will say with delight: "What a woman! I would like this!")

M. - How do you like to spend your free time?

Yu. - Free time only for idlers.

(Thus, you position yourself as a business girl who values her time. You can come up with any answers - beautiful, funny, smart. You thereby demonstrate all your facets.)

M. - Do you have a boyfriend?

(The last time you said “no.” If you answer: “At the moment, I’m free,” then you provoke him to ask the following question: “Why?” And you come up with another answer that sparks interest.)

Yu. - I have many fans, I am faced with a difficult choice.

(It's better! Be impudent to infinity. Say: "The whole world is at my feet, and you ask me about some man. Do you even understand who I am?" And then send a smiley with the words "joke" chair and get carried away. You need to be bolder!)

So, what conclusions did Julia make? “There should be creative and original questions,” my pupil reported, “either smart or funny. And I really liked that the conversation can take the form of a game. Therefore, it is better to remove the seriousness. If you start playing, it will continue further."

And it is right! It is necessary to remember the easy state of the game. Communication with a man is not hard work at the computer, but a fun and exciting action!

At the end of our experiments, I asked Julia to appear in a new character - a student who is taking my exam. I asked her the same questions, and she answered creatively.

DIALOGUE 3.

M. - Hello!

Yu. - Hello, do we know each other?

M. - No, let's get acquainted?

Yu - Now, wait, give me some time, I'll look at your photos. I'll write to you in 10 minutes. (10 minutes passed.) Okay, I'll give you that chance.

M. - Beautiful photography.

Yu. - I agree, but live I look much better.

M. - How are you in the mood?

Yu - Today is the best day in my life!

M. - Why?

Yu. - Because you wrote to me!

M. - What are you doing?

Yu. - Now I have a choice, I think what to do: chat with you or go on a date?

Now imagine that you are not just answering your partner on the Internet, but playing with him in some fantastic movie or fairy tale. Your hair flutters in the wind, you are all light, airy, interesting, love yourself, love the whole world. (I directed a fan at Yulia to create the appropriate mood.)

DIALOGUE 4. THE LAST AND MOST RIGHT.

M. - Hello!

Yu - Oh, hello! What an interesting man! Do we know each other?

M. - Yes, we may know each other. All my life I have been preparing to meet you! I dreamed about you! I was dreaming! I fell asleep - and you were before my eyes!

Yu. - Oh God, today is the best day in my life!

M. - What kind of day is this?

Yu. - The best man wrote to me! I've been waiting for you all my life!

M. - What are you doing?

Yu. - I am faced with an interesting choice: communicate with you or go on a date?

M. - Come with me on a date.

Yu. - A tempting offer, I don't even know what to do. I have two dates ahead …

At the end of the conversation, Yulia nevertheless went overboard. You can't do that. But she remembered that inner light and playful state that should accompany her during a conversation with a virtual gentleman. When a girl takes off all her clamps, she becomes an interesting companion, able to attract the man of her dreams.

CONCLUSIONS

Be original, creative and proactive when communicating with a man - this will certainly interest him and force him to continue acquaintance in real space.

Fragment of the book “How to find love through Instagram. Flirting on the Internet and more. " Pavel Rakov. - Moscow: AST Publishing House, 2019.