Master Of Your Emotions. How To Learn To Manage Them? - Self-development

A journey of thousands of miles begins under your feet …

In ancient times, there lived Marya the master. She sewed beautiful dresses - no other person could compare with her in skill.

People asked:

- Marya, take our daughters to your apprentices, otherwise they just flaunt in front of the mirror. We will pay dearly if you make them the same craftswomen.

- And I'm not a craftswoman at all. All the power is in my magic Sewing Machine.

- Sell us your car! How to become her master?

- No way. We must serve her faithfully. Then she may deign to her patronage. In the meantime, your daughters need to serve the magic Needle, receiving lessons from her in the form of injections with drops of blood.

Everyone wants to

Whoever you ask what he wants in life, it all comes down to happiness and success. Money, talent, children, family, friends, career, love, youth and beauty are the ways to achieve that very happiness and success. Moreover, everyone fills these concepts with their own content.

Does your school or university have lessons on happiness? Of course not. Everyone goes to him his own way. One is in a hurry and stumbles over potholes. He curses road services, public transport, and even fellow travelers. Another carefully looks at his feet - even stumbling over a stone, he gratefully accepts his lesson.

Which of these two has the best chance of reaching the goal?

What are we being punished for

Do you agree that nothing happens for nothing in life? That it was no coincidence that you found yourself in this place and at that hour? Your guardian angel, grinning, would answer that he tried very hard to make all the circumstances work out, and the stars converge. Because that was your lesson. And there is no need to shout "Why do I need all this?" Not "for what", but "why" - this is not a punishment at all, but a task of fate that must be passed and learned. Do you have a different opinion? Your right - there is enough rake for everyone.

The first teachers are our parents, through them we are lovingly taught important life lessons. As a child, I did not take lessons from my mother, seeing only her weakness, her unwillingness to withstand difficulties. I drove away this hopelessness … The situation with the rejection of my mother was reflected later, already in my own family. The first husband, with tenfold strength, plunged me into the abyss of difficulties. Then I realized that avoiding our lessons, not accepting the essence of difficulties, we only postpone them, and problems in the future will inevitably fall down, like from a cornucopia.

The severity of the lesson

Why doesn't life develop according to our scenario, where everything is smooth and pleasant? These are the laws of the Universe, where each person is just a small cell of the vast world. As we live our lives, we perform a certain function. The global processes of the Universe do not depend on us; there is a higher mind that controls them, and he has his own plans for us. We must accept the fact that a person is not able to comprehend the divine goal with his mind.

Losses and suffering are part of life. “God is beyond his strength to give trials” - remember this. This means that you are very strong and can withstand everything, you just need to accept and understand the lesson. Strange as it may sound, but the person who dropped his hands and floated with the flow chose the most convenient option. It's easier to withdraw into yourself and suffer than to change and make your life better.

Yes, even the incredibly grievous loss of a loved one teaches something. Death is inevitable, no matter how cruel it sounds. It makes no sense to reproach fate for injustice. Life will not allow you to exist on a groundhog day. She needs your energy. The positive, the negative that you will radiate will become the basis for her response. We must endure and continue to love life, filling ourselves with positive energy from within.

How to master the material. I am the master of emotions

I agree that at the moment of loss it is difficult to survive, and even more so to thank for it. For example, a wallet with money was stolen from a person. Of course, emotions are overwhelming. As a psychologist, I want to warn you - you cannot press them in yourself! Otherwise, you will drive negativity into your physical body, where it will transform into illness. Do you know what psychosomatics is ?

To get an energetic discharge, you can cry, shout, beat the pillow, in the end. The only thing that is impossible is to remain in this state for a long time. Then you should think about why such a situation was given, how it can be turned from negative to positive. Perhaps this is the key moment of your destiny, and you can choose a different direction, interrupt the usual circle of routine in your life.

One lady at the Code of Youth webinar told how at the age of 20 she bought the shoes of her dreams, expensive and beautiful. One guy from the university did not fit into the picture of the world, where she is a tall and slender beauty. He seemed to like him, but these breathtaking shoes … And their fate was simple - the girl herself accidentally (?) Left a bag with shoes in the subway. I cried a little and accepted this loss. By the way, that boy became her husband and love for life.

Favorite offenses

Everything went wrong, and a powerful wave of resentment rolled over. This is an incredibly powerful emotion, mentally and physically dangerous. You are not the master of emotions. If you accumulate resentment, it will become a time bomb that will surely explode. Outwardly, a person can be calm, but inside everything is boiling. Do you know the expression "quiet rage"? She herself is the resentment that absorbed sadness and anger at the same time.

Whether at the same time a person shouts at others, cries quietly for days on end, whether he smiles, driving resentment deep into the body, depends largely on attitudes coming from childhood. These are parental prohibitions on emotions: "Girls (boys) do not behave like that!", "Fu, how ugly", "Don't yell!" Do not try to be offended by mom-dad now! This was your lesson too.

Bans on emotions deprive a person of time to say goodbye to unfulfilled plans, lost illusions or lost things. As a result, a character is formed with traits of weakness, defenselessness, impulsiveness, rigidity, inability to cope with emotions.

Where harmony lives

To control emotions, you need to turn on awareness, understand that you are the master of emotions. In the Code of Youth methodology, we pay a lot of attention to special highly effective practices. I built these author's techniques from my own life experience of achieving harmony. I explain to the listeners that all the work should go on within oneself, and not in an external struggle with "enemies" - harmful neighbors, an unjust boss, etc.

When a person, through awareness, learns to control his emotions, he will be able to accept life as it is and be happy! He will rightfully call himself “the master of emotions”. Finally, the caterpillar, after going through all the lessons, will turn into a beautiful butterfly fluttering from flower to flower!