Emotional Intelligence EQ Or Mental Development IQ? What Determines Success In Life - Self-development, Society

2023 Author: Oswald Adamson | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-05-21 20:18

High quality of life, physical health, loyal friends, strong family, success in the professional field, all these are well-recognized signs of well-being, which we all try to achieve as best we can. Well-developed emotional intelligence (EQ or EI) can help improve your chances of getting what you want

Mankind has thought about the influence of feelings on decision-making throughout the history of its existence. The idea of the inseparability of emotions and rationality arose in religious and philosophical teachings, reasoning on this topic can be found in the Old Testament, and in the works of ancient sages, and in the works of philosophers of the New Age.

Unfortunately, scientific thought more and more followed the path of recognizing the primacy of reason over feelings. Until recently, it was considered good form to suppress or ignore emotions. An expressive person was considered unrestrained, ill-mannered and even licentious, and vivid manifestations of feelings were associated with a lack of intelligence.

Emotions were discarded as something insignificant, if not harmful, dangerous and destructive. So enlightened humanity has lost healthy contact with an important part of its inner world

Intelligence is the head of everything?

It was assumed that the "smarter" a person is, the better he copes with complex production and life tasks. More recently, when you were hired for any significant position, you might be asked to complete an IQ test. Scientists have worked hard to determine as accurately as possible what cognitive abilities a person has, and have developed tests to identify them.

These abilities are for the most part innate and depend on genes, which means they are practically not amenable to development. The logic is simple - using the test, we determine how high a person's IQ is and assign him to the appropriate position.

All this, of course, is wonderful, but what does this have to do with real life? How does a high IQ contribute to your success in building your career or networking? Is it enough to have a high intelligence in order to become a demanded leader, leader, specialist?

Secret ingredient

In the twentieth century, scientists finally recognized that IQ is not very correlated with success. Then the search began for the "secret ingredient" - signs that actually determine how well a person's life will turn out. It turned out that along with intelligence, a person's overall success is influenced by his ability to establish and maintain social ties, empathize and empathize, as well as his ability to self-knowledge and self-control.

Emotional intelligence is a form of social intelligence that includes the ability to recognize your own and others' feelings and emotions, distinguish between them, and use this knowledge to guide your thinking and actions.

Salovey and Mayer

Emotion or not is not a choice. The ability to feel is fixed in us evolutionarily, we are not free to turn it off by a volitional decision. We cannot tell our body which emotions we agree to and which ones need to get rid of. Any attempts to ignore or suppress this sphere of inner life lead to unpleasant and irreversible consequences.

The lack of understanding of how our inner world works, according to what laws it exists and how to handle it, incredibly limits us. After all, if we do not know ourselves, we are not able to understand the other. Unconscious internal processes govern us and affect how we interact with others. These days, social contacts are more important than ever, because it is almost impossible to achieve success alone.

Our ability to build and maintain relationships is critical to our overall life success

Developed emotional intelligence in the modern world helps us to become the best professionals, colleagues, friends, relatives, lovers, neighbors, people with whom we want to keep in touch, it is pleasant to live nearby and work together. The ability for mutually beneficial cooperation, as a result of high EI, is the basis not only for personal success, but for social prosperity in general.

4 pillars of emotional intelligence

1. Self-knowledge. The ability to recognize your emotions and thoughts associated with them. The ability to determine what and in what circumstances causes these feelings. Mindfulness of the physiological reactions of your body associated with the emotions you are experiencing.
2. Self-regulation. The ability to control yourself, your behavior. Ability to choose an adequate form of expression of emotions. The ability to make decisions based on feelings experienced.
3. Empathy. Ability to understand another, empathize with him. The ability to recognize the emotions, feelings and motives of another.
4. Social skills. The ability to interact with others, taking into account their feelings and the feelings of another.