How Do You Achieve Emotional Maturity? 5 Consecutive Steps - Self-development

2023 Author: Oswald Adamson | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-05-21 20:18

An emotionally mature person feels the joy of life and knows how to create it in accordance with his aspirations and ideals, to reveal and realize his potential to the fullest. Emotional maturity is an adult position from which a person stops blaming external circumstances or other people for their own failures. How do you achieve emotional maturity?

An emotionally mature person fully accepts responsibility for everything that happens to him, thereby gaining the opportunity to control himself and his life.

Knowing yourself, your reactions to external events, the ability to describe your feelings and emotions, as well as understanding why they arise and what is behind them are also qualities of an emotionally mature person. He can consciously and freely choose beautiful, positive and constructive states instead of destructive negative emotions and automatic unconscious reactions. Knows how to feel and understand other people and build harmonious relationships with others.

It seems that this is impossible to achieve. Yes, it is not so easy, but anyone who wants it can do it.

Step 1 - set intent

In order to come to emotional maturity, make the intention to take responsibility for your life and create it yourself. This is the first step, without which subsequent ones are impossible.

What makes intention different is that it has a decision to act and an understanding of how to move towards your goal.

Step 2 - self-observation and self-knowledge

In order to be able to choose how to react to this or that event, first of all, it is necessary to notice and accurately name that feeling or emotion that appeared automatically, which we did not choose consciously or which we cannot cope with.

In order to start observing your manifestations, I recommend using the "Diary of Emotions" - a special notebook for notes. Choose a convenient time during the day and devote it to noticing what feeling or emotion you are experiencing right now. Use the Dictionary of Emotions to name your condition and write it down in your journal. Try to find two more words that would clarify your feelings. Also write down the event that caused them. Then test the intensity of your emotions. Each of the emotions contains shades and gradations. Maybe the feeling "I'm furious" is more like irritation from fatigue or misunderstanding? And in other cases, is it closer to impatience? When describing your experiences, rate them on a scale of 1-10. Reflect on howwhat is behind the feelings - what character traits and unresolved needs are hidden behind them, and also write it down in a notebook.

It is important to do this exercise daily with both positive and negative emotions. As a result, you will learn to accurately determine your state and get a picture of your usual reactions, you will see what exactly interferes and requires changes.

Step 3 - mindfulness in the here and now

In order to notice and accurately name your states, you need the skill of self-awareness in the moment, in "here and now." This skill can and should be trained.

Special exercises for focusing attention, meditation, yoga will help with this. Choose the one that works best for you and practice it regularly. Remember that only regular training will gradually develop this skill.

Step 4 - self-regulation and informed choice

Then, when you learn to be present in the moment “here and now”, the next step is to consciously choose those states in which you want to live your life. This is self-control. Instead of being hostage to life's circumstances, your own automatic reactions and negative, destructive emotions, you become an active creator of your life and can fill it with beautiful states - inspiration, joy, confidence, serenity, harmony, trust and love.

Step 5 - empathy and building harmonious relationships

As you reach emotional maturity, you choose the kind of relationships you want with other people and you know how to create them. Deep knowledge of oneself opens up the ability to understand and feel others. Instead of competing, comparing, arguing, and conflicting, you can create beautiful, harmonious relationships that have mutual enrichment, understanding and love.

Each of the 5 steps to emotional maturity takes action and practice. But the result is worth it

As you become emotionally mature, you gain inner freedom and the ability to create the life you dream of.

Posted by Vania Markovich on Instagram