Table of contents:
- You have always thought it was happening to someone else. They believed that you were already insured against such a nightmare. And when something terrible happened, you are seized with utter confusion, mixed with a sense of guilt and shame. Bitterness and helplessness from the fact that they could not, did not see, did not have time
- How not to view?
- Forewarned is forearmed
- Why did this happen?
- What to do?
- What you definitely shouldn't do
- Attention - codependency
- Urgently see a doctor
- Long way to yourself
Video: "My Child Is A Drug Addict!" How To Save And Be Saved Yourself? - Quality Of Life, Society
You have always thought it was happening to someone else. They believed that you were already insured against such a nightmare. And when something terrible happened, you are seized with utter confusion, mixed with a sense of guilt and shame. Bitterness and helplessness from the fact that they could not, did not see, did not have time
How not to view?
The child grows, becomes more independent. Mom and Dad are happy to let go of the "reins" of control and guardianship and are glad that the child has become an adult and independent. During this important period, it is important to let your teenager understand that in a difficult situation, parents will help him. There is no need to be afraid to tell - of course, no one will praise for a misconduct, but the family will solve the problem together.
Joint leisure, which is interesting for everyone, is a great way to become aware of the child's family rear. Let it be two hour board games on Sundays. Or a tradition to celebrate Children's Day together. Discussion of a new film, walks, trips to a concert or performance. Life can be fun and challenging without any stimulants. The most important thing is that the child sees this in the family.
Forewarned is forearmed
Study the most common types of drugs among young people, the effects of them, the consequences of their use. What drugs look like and how to recognize addiction. All this may not be useful to you, but information is always capital.
Moments that should alert:
1. Strangeness of behavior
The child may stop communicating with old friends, but does not talk about new ones. Energy is replaced by apathy, irritability appears. The teenager avoids contact with you.
Carelessness, lack of basic personal hygiene. Pallor, bruising under the eyes. Increased or suppressed appetite out of the blue. In the case of intravenous drugs, clothing that covers the maximum of the body, at any time of the year.
Lies on trifles and already as if out of habit. Cunning, especially if earlier it was unusual for a child's character.
4. Increase in material demands
The child asks for more money from you and from relatives. Perhaps something was missing from the house, but you thought that the thing was lost. It will not be superfluous to ask your relatives if your teenager has turned to them for financial help.
5. Strange objects
Despite the cunning and resourcefulness inherent in addicts, you can find strange and incomprehensible objects that ended up in the apartment. Rubber tubes, vials for nasal drops, antihistamines not used by anyone in the family. By the way, you are unlikely to find syringes - they will be thrown away first.
Why did this happen?
The obvious causes of addiction are just the tip of the iceberg. The desire to be like everyone else, self-affirmation, fueled by family problems. The prospect of new sensations and curiosity. Powerful surges of hormones in puberty, which spur to action "in spite of". The first thing to do is stop blaming yourself for your son or daughter's addiction. Otherwise, you will not have the strength to take decisive and correct actions in the current difficult situation. Realize that this mistake is not yours, it is your child's path and experience. But you can help him cope with it.
What to do?
No matter how cloying and intrusive it may sound, the first thing to start with is a conversation. Discussion of the problem, calm questions and assumptions. The child must hear (even if he is not able to realize now) - you are ready to help him get rid of the addiction. You are by his side, not against him.
What you definitely shouldn't do
In the heat of the moment, you can threaten anything. Of course, the threats will not be followed. And the child will no longer take them seriously.
➤ Scream, cry
Of course, this is a natural reaction to what is overturned on you now. But when you do this in front of a child, you show your weakness and helplessness. And he needs confidence that you are support and strength. Because now there is no solid ground under his feet.
➤ Insult, beat
This is the road in the opposite direction from trust. You push away and destroy the remnants of what the child could cling to in search of salvation.
➤ Blackmail, bribe
In a situation of serious addiction, the addict does not care about any material benefits, except for those that can be sold / exchanged for the drug. The promise of an apartment, cars for giving up drugs are extremely ineffective.
Attention - codependency
Drug addiction affects not only the addict himself, but also his environment. The most common stories during rehabilitation are the stories of relatives about how they “did everything” to help, and in the end, things got even worse. The eternal search for a dose and the animal fear of withdrawal makes the addict an enviable manipulator.
Reproaches, pressure on pity, accusations of misunderstanding and complexes, constant psychological pressure - this is the reality of the addict's family. It is important to know: as long as someone supports the existence of a drug addict, he will continue to live in his world. No matter how painful and sorry you may be, stop any financial assistance. Money, food and even housing: the instinct of self-preservation will stimulate the addict to certain actions for a long time. And thirst and cold will work better than crying and pleading. This does not mean not showing pity and compassion. Make it clear that you hate not him, but his illness.
Urgently see a doctor
A visit to a narcologist will help you, first of all, to remain in "sound mind and sober memory", which means that it will increase the chances of getting rid of addiction in a child.
According to statistics, only 10% of drug addicts voluntarily agree to treatment. Forced admission to a hospital (for example, with withdrawal or overdose) will not work. Many addicts consciously lie down to "cleanse themselves" in order to return to their old life with renewed vigor. If you could not persuade your child to receive treatment, the only way out is to contact a specialist. The most powerful way to stimulate treatment is through intervention.
Psychological intervention is a technique that allows you to motivate the patient to a healthy lifestyle. It excludes pressure on the drug addict: the doctor only "catches" the patient's attention, forcing him to be involved in the discussion of the problem, and ultimately forcing her to admit. At the same time, the specialist bypasses the psychological defense mechanisms that prevent the addict from seeing the disease. The procedure involves a psychiatrist, a narcologist, and sometimes former addicts - volunteers of drug treatment centers. This implies going home to the addict, and in 97 out of 100 cases the meeting ends with the addict's consent to go to the hospital.
Long way to yourself
Treatment consists of several stages:
This is the stage aimed at cleansing the body. Usually these are droppers under the round-the-clock supervision of a doctor. The detox usually takes four days.
2. Drug therapy
Unfortunately, drugs subtly but powerfully undermine the body's resources. Serious problems with immunity, the occurrence of concomitant diseases - all this requires long-term treatment. In addition to drugs, vitamin complexes are prescribed for general health promotion.
There will be both individual and group work with a specialist. Sometimes in parallel, sometimes the addict comes to the group a little later. At the meetings, the reasons why the patient started using drugs are identified. Clearly understanding and eliminating the causes is a big step towards returning to normal life.
Working on yourself and starting a new life. The process will last at least six months. Awareness of his personality, a sense of responsibility, a sober assessment of his actions and actions, the ability to socialize gradually returns. Everything that was destroyed by drugs. Labor adaptation helps to find one's place in the "clean" world. It is easier for a former addict to accept himself as a full-fledged member of society, doing something useful for others.
We, parents, love our children more than anything else. We are ready to give them our very best. Take away pain, solve all problems, protect from evil. But in the context of drug addiction, this is the most malignant behavior. Constantly making decisions for our own child, we push him to dependence.
An addicted child primarily needs support in making a decision. It often turns out to be unbearably difficult. Therefore, in work and in the fight against drug addiction, it is a specialist who can provide the main assistance in treatment. Both the child and the codependent loved one. And to love, support and be together is already our parental present. And believe me, the darkest night is before dawn.