"You Shouldn't Think About Death " To Parents About Teenage Suicide - Research, Society

According to the Investigative Committee of the Russian Federation, in 2017 there were 692 suicides of minors, in 2018 more by 14% - 788 suicides. Only proven cases are included in the statistics. Suicidal attempts, when a child was rescued, are not included in this figure, often remaining "a personal family matter."

Any suicidal statistics are always approximate, but even approximate figures inspire serious concern. Therefore, you do not need to be a suicidologist, but you must know the basics of preventing suicidal behavior.

Most of the cases are related to large cities. The larger the city, the lower the level of involvement of others in the affairs of the family, more often adolescents are left alone with their problems, the lower is the altruistic activity. The smaller the settlement, the better the residents know each other, the situation around the child is in full view, the norms of mutual assistance are higher, the more chances of getting help.

Self-directed aggression

There are three forms of auto-aggression, depending on awareness and purposefulness:

1. Suicide or suicidal attempts are deliberate acts aimed at ending life.
2. Suicidal equivalents are unconscious actions without a goal of ending life, which can lead to unplanned death (for example, unforeseen injuries, victimization, risky behavior).
3. Self-harm - deliberate actions without the goal of ending life, aimed at causing harmless harm to the body.

If a suicidal attempt, suicidal equivalents or self-harm is detected, the child must be shown to a child psychiatrist in order to rule out health problems; after that, a course of psychotherapy is recommended to correct unwanted behaviors and help the parent and child develop new coping strategies.

The reasons for the suicidal activity of the child

1. Social factors: frequent conflicts with loved ones, distance and alienation in contacts with parents, suicidal behavior in the family, mental health problems, physical or sexual abuse, bullying (bullying) at school, trauma of first love, the experience of the death of a loved one, alcoholism, drug addiction one of the parents ¹. Prevention will be: close and trusting relationships with parents, a healthy psyche of loved ones and timely seeking help from a psychologist or psychiatrist, the child's physical safety, an adequate healthy lifestyle for parents, fostering confidence, criticality, and communicative competence.

2. A dangerous age - adolescents in different combinations and with different strengths collect in their age crisis feelings of isolation, helplessness, a sense of hopelessness and their own insignificance - emotions that contribute to suicidal activity. They are the most vulnerable, because their life opportunities to be the subject, the author of the action have increased, but the mechanisms of psychological defense are still weak, emerging. Defiant rudeness and self-confidence with vulnerability and sensitivity live in a teenager at the same time. Whatever your teen is up to, he still desperately needs the help and support of an adult. As in that childhood story about the penguin's dad, when deciding the question "Spank or hug?", It is better to make the choice in favor of the latter. The more conflict a teenager behaves, the more he needs a "warm" adult.

   Even a demonstrative attempt at suicide, out of a desire to scare the parents, can accidentally end in death. All manifestations of adolescent suicidal activity (statements, threats, actions) should be taken as seriously as possible.

3. "The Werther effect" - imitative suicide. A suicidal act is perceived by adolescents as a spectacular, dramatic sign of courage. The widespread coverage of cases of teenage suicide on the Internet contributes to this vision of suicide of the fate of famous actors, musicians. Pay attention to the teen's hobbies and the well-being of the characters represented there. Do not be intimidated by the interest of older adolescents in the topic of death - it corresponds to age characteristics. In adolescence, it is common to re-comprehend life in terms of its finitude and distribution of available life time. The child's excessive preoccupation with a person who ended his life prematurely and on his own initiative should alert the child (K. Cobain, C. Bennington and others).

Signs of increased suicidal risk

• Frequent complaints, whims, concentration on their suffering, tears;
• angry depression, irritability;
• hatred for the well-being of others;
• decrease in physical activity, refusal of activity (lies all the time);
• unreasonably risky actions;
• lack of positive plans for the future, pessimism, self-blame;
• evaluating the past in a negative way, looking for old grievances;
• indifference to yourself and others, cessation of caring for appearance;
• physical symptoms: shortness of breath, headache, trouble sleeping, feeling physically heavy, menstrual irregularities;
• giving away your own favorite things or giving “parting” gifts to others;
• reports of suicidal intentions in joke or in the form of promises;
• reasoning that life depends on a particular person or his relationship (“I can't live without it,” especially during the period of my first love);
• search for information on methods of suicide ².

If you observe the above manifestations in a child, you may need to observe the child more closely and, if necessary, consult a specialist.

Anti-suicidal factors

The level of suicidal risk will be significantly lower if the teenager's life includes:

• emotional attachment (family, friends, favorite teachers, pets);
• family ties and responsibilities (helping elders, caring for the younger);
• a sense of duty, honor (ideas about responsibility, areas in which a teenager takes responsibility at school and at home);
• the value of life as such (as a gift from above, as an opportunity to do something useful);
• having plans for the future and goals in life (forecasting, the ability to set near and long-term goals);
• a healthy lifestyle (culture of caring for the physical "I");
• the ability to see opportunities, to perceive life positively (the ability to accept difficulties as a feasible test, as an opportunity to learn something new);
• faith, spirituality (belonging to religion).

The list of anti-suicidal factors can be used as a test: imagine your teenager and rate how characteristic these qualities are on a five-point scale. If you get most 4s and 5s, great. If not, you can see from the numbers from 1 to 3 in which directions it makes sense to work.

By creating a close, trusting relationship with a teenager, parents gently monitor the child's emotional state, stress factors present in his life, experiences, change of interests. Attentive attitude to the child, well-established mutual understanding, strengthening of the internal resources of the teenager's personality (confidence, self-esteem, critical thinking) is the main prevention of suicidal risk.

Sources:

1. Lyubov EB Clinical and social burden of relatives of a suicide victim: if only … // Suicidology. 2017. T. 8. No. 4 (29). S. 56–76.
2. Sakovich N. A. Dialogues on the Hades threshold. Fairytale therapy in the prevention and correction of adolescent suicidal behavior. M.: Genesis, 2012.