The Myth Of The Bogatyr And Beregin. The Dangers Of Gender Socialization - Society

Instructions on how to "correctly" educate children of different sexes are found in pedagogical works from Antiquity to the present day. The rationale for these differences always lie in the sphere of "naturalness": ancient philosophers pointed to the "underdevelopment" of the female soul, modern - to the "evolutionary adaptability" of men to hunting, and women - to gathering and caring for offspring

Not by nature

The “gender issue” is one of the most striking illustrations of the phenomenon of interiorization. A newborn child does not feel like a girl or a boy - adults inform him about it. They also explain in detail what should and should not be done in order to correspond to the “correct” gender role model.

It is curious, however, that the “traditional” gender approach does not see a contradiction between the fact that “masculine” and “feminine” qualities are strongly recommended to form from early childhood ¹, and the fact that the origin of these qualities continues to be persistently attributed to biological reasons.

It would seem that if a certain characteristic is innate, then there is no need to "educate" it in a person - on the contrary, you will have to spend a lot of effort to at least partially mask it.

This happened, for example, with left-handedness - in those days when it was considered "wrong", teachers resorted to serious tricks in order to "teach" children to write with their right hand - up to tying rulers to their hands and hitting the fingers when trying to write on his own. Nevertheless, left-handers who are "retrained" in childhood often complain that, although they really write with their right hand (and, as a rule, have terrible handwriting), they still hold all other objects - a spoon, tools, a needle - with their left …

With "innate" masculinity and femininity, everything, it would seem, should be about the same. But no, a huge number of people (and among them, unfortunately, there are many psychologists and educators) continue to assert that the “wrong” modern upbringing has led to the fact that there are too many “effeminate men” and “masculine women” around.

This is usually followed by advice to parents on how to prevent such a confusion of roles in their own children. The simple idea of abandoning the obviously inoperative paradigm of dividing mental qualities into "male" and "female" is, of course, not there.

Legacy pitfalls

The “traditional” approach to gender education is fraught with many dangers that seriously complicate the life of both sexes. For men, following the "correct masculinity" model carries the following risks:

• The prohibition on the expression of emotions leads to the accumulation of "unreacted" feelings, provoking problems with both psychological and physical health.
• Encouraging risky behavior increases the number of deaths in adolescents and young men. The reason - senseless checks "for weakness" and fear to look like a "coward" in the eyes of others.
• The orientation towards hierarchy and competition turns life into an endless race in which there is no way to stop or even really win - there will always be someone more successful and stronger.
• Rejection of weakness leads to the fact that any inconsistency with the image of a "strong man" - illness, failure, job loss, etc. - leads to the collapse of self-esteem and severe stress.
• The ban on taking care of oneself does not allow recognizing the importance of regular rest, preventive (and sometimes emergency) visits to doctors, etc., which leads to an increase in diseases, their late diagnosis and the occurrence of complications.
• The inability to build partnerships in the traditional model with the "breadwinner" and "homemaker", on the one hand, cuts off the opportunity to build emotional ties with family and children, and on the other hand, imposes sole responsibility for the financial support of the family, which is often overwhelming.

For women, the situation is largely mirrored, but the consequences in many cases are much more difficult:

• A ban on aggression leads to the redirection of "negative" feelings - anger, rage, anger - to themselves, which results in various forms of self-destructive behavior, depression, neurosis, etc.
• Encouraging addictive behavior distorts social interaction, forcing other women to be perceived as competitors in the competition for the attention of men, and men themselves as sources of social or financial resources.
• The orientation towards giving up a career in favor of reproductive work seriously limits the possibilities of financial independence and becomes a prerequisite for involvement in various types of domestic violence.
• The imposition of standards of "beauty" violates self-esteem, gives rise to various forms of body dysmorphic disorder and eating disorders.
• Limiting the types of physical activity reduces the chances of self-defense in the event of an attack, limits the possibilities of self-realization in sports and in professional activity.
• Consolidation of learned helplessness gives rise to pathological self-doubt, fear of getting out of relationships (even if they take a violent form), inability to take responsibility for their own lives.

There is only one thing that can be opposed to the division of people into “right” and “wrong” men and women - a critical attitude to the traditional gender approach. This means accepting a simple fact: the individual characteristics of each person are impossible, and it is pointless to try to squeeze them into the framework of masculinity or femininity.

Each and every one of us is a whole world, a huge universe in which there is a place not only for Mars and Venus, but also for Earth, and Pluto, and the mysterious Alpha Centauri and distant unknown galaxies …

Peckova L. G. Formation of gender behavior in children in preschool organizations // International student scientific bulletin. 2018. No. 3 (5). URL: eduherald.ru/ru/article/view?id=18450 (date of access: 01.03.2019)