Why Does A Child Need Free Time? - Society

What do good, caring parents very often do now? They develop the child: they sign up for tutors, the little ones - in developing studios. Older children go to sports clubs, to a music school. And they do not leave them free time at all. Now there are a lot of such parents and such children. What does this lead to? Find out the reasoned opinion of a psychologist

I often face the fact that the child is brought to a psychologist and the parents cannot find the time when the child can visit this psychologist. Because there are simply no “windows” between circles, tutors … And my mother asks: “Maybe on Sunday? He only has one tutor on Sunday."

In fact, these children often become clients of psychologists. Overloaded with development activities, they, having a baggage of knowledge and educational skills, lag behind in development and in other important things

Parents say about their schoolboy son: “Give him some free time - he will bury himself in the computer all Sunday. He doesn't want to play, read, or hang out with friends. " Or maybe, from early childhood, the child was taken from one development studio to another, then from circle to circle, he simply did not have time, which he disposed of himself?

• And he just didn't learn how to manage his time. Accustomed to not knowing what he wants. Because managing your free time is development.
• And I haven't learned to communicate. A child is not born with the ability to communicate with peers. To form it, he needs to communicate a lot with peers. Because communication is also development.
• And I lost the habit of playing early. If all the toys were taken away from the child (“He is already big, all the toys must be put away, donated, thrown away …”) So he forgot how to play. And play is development.

Let's take a closer look at all this.

Free time is needed for mental development

The main way of knowing the world at different ages is different. And for a long time it is not at all important for a child whether they show him letters. If they show - why not? But don't take toys from him.

The older the child, the more difficult his games are. And not only because he had already “developed mentally” somewhere and this manifested itself in the game. He develops mentally because he plays these games

Free time is needed to develop communication skills

How does a child under three or three and a half years old play with another child? He took something away, or came up and touched this child, or hit him on the head with a scoop. Begins to interact. Can come up and treat you with something. These are very simple steps. And when parents do not allow another child to hit or take something away from him, show how to share, they teach him to communicate.

And then the game greatly complicates and develops this interaction. It is very important for children to play with each other. Because in the game they learn the rules by which those around them live.

If a child is "to capacity" loaded with all sorts of circles, tutors, sections, he develops mentally or physically, but not psychologically. The ability to communicate, to notice what another person is feeling, to understand how to react to it does not develop

The ability to make friends, cooperate, negotiate. Later - the ability to fall in love and communicate with the opposite sex. These "peepers", then - how to approach and speak … This all happens in informal communication.

Do not flatter yourself about the school (and different circles, by the way, too). There is very little free communication at school. The school is organized, structured by lessons. And the child needs his own share of communication outside of school

Overwhelmed and poorly communicated children often have trouble standing up for themselves. They either often take offense or are very aggressive. There are problems with coming up and getting to know each other. Or there are constant conflicts, and the child does not understand why this is happening. Because the development of communication did not occur.

Free time and free choice are needed to develop individuality

And in the end, the child's personality is formed in his free time. Nowadays it is very often called creativity actions according to a template. People paint coloring pages (for example, mandalas), or do crafts according to an algorithm (say, diamond painting is beautiful), or paint a picture by numbers. And they cannot create their own, if in childhood they did not have the opportunity to play freely, to choose for themselves how to spend their time. What toy to take from the shelf, what to draw.

Then the parents are surprised that the son or daughter does not know what he wants when it comes time to go to university. But he doesn't know for a long time what he needs

The conclusion is simple. When your son asks to enroll him in a specific sports section, do so. If he does it, it’s good. If not, that's fine too. He, growing up and developing, is in constant search, clarifies what kind of person he is, what he likes, what suits him.

Or, if the girl wants to paint instead of dancing, let her learn to paint. In such things it is very important to reckon with the child. This is the development of his personality. This is his opportunity to be himself. Look for yourself - a unique, unique person. And it is important for adults to respect this search.

Mental development is of course also very important. And the accumulation of knowledge is important. Know what is more important. One circle and one tutor. Or a couple of tutors. Know how to stop, decide when enough is enough.

If a child goes to a music school, where he is busy every day, think: is it necessary to record him somewhere else? Think about the balance of free time and study - this is important