How Can A Girl Get An Orgasm? - Relationship, Sex

To get the most out of your sex life, you need to learn how to relax in bed. Many women don't know what it is like to be a queen in bed with your partner. They quite cope with the role of a wife and a caring mommy, but a violent orgasm, a complete shutdown of the head during sex is alien to them

Can I relax?

In one of the Dutch universities, Professor Gert Holstege conducted a small study: he observed the reaction of the brain during orgasm. 13 women took part: all of them turned off their brains at the peak of pleasure. During a real orgasm, only two parts of the brain remain on in a woman: perception and coordination. Logic, consciousness - everything turns off. Simulating an orgasm is another matter. This is where all the activity is saved.

Now you understand that relaxation is a direct path to orgasm. The present, and not the one that you imitate, so as not to upset your partner. Some women simply cannot pull the trigger and give free rein to emotions. Why? Let's figure it out.

Test: can you enjoy sex

What's in the way?

1. Mismatch of temperaments

For example, if you are passionate and aggressive and he is gentle and calm, a mismatch will occur. There should be two "+" or two "-" in bed. Your temperaments should match. It is corny, if he moves quickly, and she loves slowly - what kind of sex will turn out then? That's right - none.

Here you should understand that a person in bed and in life are often two different personalities. Find common points in sex and focus on them, if not quite the right temperament is the only obstacle to orgasm.

2. Different fantasies

Do your sexual desires match? If you don’t know, this is even a more global problem than if the answer was “no”. Don't be afraid to tell each other about your dreams. They don't have to be the same, but they should charge and excite.

Start discussing sex. Of course, not everyone is ready to dump their innermost thoughts on the first date. Everything comes gradually. But make sure that there is still talk and trust in this regard.

If your fantasies cause negative emotions in him, it's time to think about whether this is your man.

Test: what to do if the relationship is at an impasse

3. Lack of trust

The man next to you should inspire a sense of security and trust. In general, other areas of relationships do not have a chance of development without these components, but sex in the first place. When there is no trust, control turns on, and this is tension. If warmth and safety are not emanating from a man, a woman cannot relax.

How to plunge into the whirlpool?

Don't strain yourself

Stop thinking about what you need to have time to wash, how is your child at school, worry about your friend, etc. Your task during intercourse is to get pleasure. Stop. Forget about everything that weighs you down and drop obsessive thoughts. Did you know that many women solve pressing problems in their heads during sex? Do you want an orgasm? Don't be like that.

Work on childhood traumas

Very often, parents leave a bad stamp on the sex education of a child. Mother insists that it is impossible before the wedding. Her diligent daughter is already 30, she is not married, and during every sex she thinks about how bad she is, since she disobeyed her beloved mother.

It is even worse if the child is caught masturbating as a child. In general, there can be a lot of fears and traumas from the past. The question is, are we working with them, or are we trying to forget.

Learn to be a queen

Yes, not a mother, not a wife, not a mistress, but a queen. We women have thousands of thoughts constantly spinning in our heads. If during sex you behave like a caring mommy, afraid to touch the penis or directly say that you are tired of the position, then do not complain about the lack of pleasure later.

Leave all roles outside the door. You come to bed as the sexiest slut, ready for unforgettable pleasure. Children, pie, parents, friends, work - we turn it off. We activate arousal and open the way to orgasm.

Being a queen is hampered by the burden of additional roles, which many forget to throw off. You can't be in several roles at the same time. You are either the queen or the servant.

Test: how much do I depend on my beloved?

Love yourself.

How often have you been bothered to relax by the thought that you do not have the same breast size, too big belly or butt? Low self-esteem, fears, self-doubt prevent us from fully liberating ourselves. First you need to love yourself. The way you are. Self-love creates confidence and relieves fear. We get the very relaxation we need to get an orgasm.

So, you need to find a man with whom the temperament and fantasies coincide, and who can be trusted. You need to learn not to strain, work through childhood traumas, love yourself, and finally start having fun in bed

Read also:

• Sex with the head. How love making affects the brain
• Project "Sex in Cinema": a sexologist about the film "No hysteria!" Why women don't have fun
• At the peak of pleasure. Everything You Wanted To Know About The Female Orgasm