6 Steps To Amazing Discoveries In Your Life - Self-development

It is completely natural to feel fear. The problem begins when fear blocks action and we no longer strive for the new, unknown. This article is an excuse to shake yourself up and say to yourself, “Wow! What an interesting idea! I will do it!" Forward to amazing discoveries in your life

Why are we afraid to act?

• “I’m afraid to look for a new job because I’m not sure of myself, I don’t think I can handle it.”
• “I'm afraid to go to a good university, because I won't pass the exams, it's better not to try.”
• "I am afraid to meet this girl, because she will definitely refuse me."

Familiar stories?

We are afraid to act because we are afraid of the pain that uncertainty can bring with it

By avoiding pain, we also avoid life. Her options that could have been if … the guy approached the girl and found in her a person who is important to him; a student would go to a prestigious university, a man would find another job and fulfill his dream.

The instability to life challenges can be traced in a wide variety of anxiety disorders - panic attacks, codependency, bear sickness, and so on

Panic attacks

• "It's scary to go down the subway, because an attack can happen."
• “I cannot leave my house and go to the store, because there may not be anyone around to help me.”

Yielding to his fears, a person increasingly restricts his own behavior. Thinking he is coping with the disorder, he only aggravates it.

A destructive mechanism is fixed in the psyche. I believe that I cannot cope with something, I am inactive, the experience is reinforced, which leads to the further development of the disorder.

It is important to realize that such a strategy does not help, but worsens the situation.

By themselves, stress situations play a lesser role in the formation of anxiety and physical disturbance than how a person perceives these situations

Aaron Beck, psychotherapist

Codependency

Here, fear first contributes to the emergence and development of the disorder.

• “Why do I need love? There is a man nearby, I know him, he knows me. "
• “Why will I fight for my happiness? It's hard, difficult, long, even better as it is, everything suits me. "

Making such choices, a person refuses integrity, is not realized, the fear of being himself firmly settles inside. And the longer it lasts, the harder it is to return to yourself.

It gets scary to say or do something that goes against the way you think and act. Man successfully deceives himself

It is important to understand that getting rid of the problem is impossible without overcoming yourself, your own volitional effort and courage.

Bear disease

It is also called student, when emotional stress causes indigestion. Yes, uncertainty can affect us even at the physical level.

• "Will I be able to or not?"
• "Am I a winner or a loser?"

When psychological resources are not enough, physiology "fails". The way out is the same - to manifest, to act, to choose a new, unknown.

Every experience of victory builds self-esteem; every defeat requires rethinking. But inaction is the most dangerous thing. It is this that can "bury" all your dreams. And the "bulk" of plans will remain unfulfilled

6 steps towards uncertainty

How not to miss the moment when life seems to ask you: "Are you ready?" How to make the right choice?

1. Calculate losses

What do you lose every time you succumb to fear and choose not to manifest, not to take risks? It is clear that you are losing the possibility of implementation. But not only her. It is time, people, good mood, and the experience of victory, which could have happened, but did not happen. This is the money you could make. This is respect from loved ones who could be proud of you.

Such analysis often plays the role of a "magic kick", allows a person to start getting angry with himself.

2. Get angry with yourself

Every time you give up, deep down you don't respect yourself, you feel ashamed, which you are likely to repress.

Return to your senses. This will allow you to take responsibility for your life and make your own choices every time.

3. Be responsible for your actions

An experiment by American psychologist Stanley Milgram showed how easily people avoid responsibility. The experimenter asked the subjects to shock the person who was acting as a student. He justified this by saying that punishment would help him study well. The subjects began to zealously follow the instructions of the experimenter and reached shocks of 300-400 volts. They didn’t know that in reality there were no electric shocks. They were amazed at the self-reports of these people - they were completely sure that only the experimenter was responsible for this cruelty, not they.

Look deep into yourself and ask yourself: Do you really always take responsibility for your actions?

4. Do what inspires you

Increase the amount of your psychological resources - hobbies, things you love, emotional connections with friends, sports, travel. Anything that fills you with genuine joy will do.

5. And most importantly - just act

Every time you choose between being active and not taking action, take action. Make the strategy of active action in situations of uncertainty your habit.

6. If you need help - do not hesitate

If you realize that the situation is objectively difficult - do not delay, seek professional psychological help.

Read more about this in the books:

• Stanley Milgram. “Submission to authority. Scientific view of power and morality”;
• Rollo May. "The meaning of anxiety."