How To Recognize A Lie? - Society

Remember the TV show "Lie to Me", where the main character, Dr. Lightman, could determine by the micro and macro expressions of a person's face whether he was lying or not? This method has a solid psychological foundation. True, here you have to study for a long time, train and carefully study the facial expressions of hundreds and thousands of people. But to understand whether you are being deceived or not, you want to now, you must agree. How to recognize a lie without knowing the heroes of "Lie to Me"?

Let's make a reservation right away - for each person it is necessary to make an adjustment for his personality and individuality. And also understand that you may think “He / she is deceiving me about this”, but in fact he / she is deceiving you for a completely different reason.

7 and 3/4 signs of cheating

1. Inconsistency of facts

This is the main point, because, as the great one said, "A liar must have a perfect memory, which is impossible." Any wife knows how to check whether her husband was fishing or not - you just need to ask some details. For the husband, the "fisher," may forget something from his cover, even if he came with a fish and in wet boots. The subordinate to you on the phone says that he was poisoned, and the next day he sniffles, referring to ARVI. Do you understand, yes? If you suspect lies in the speech of the interlocutor, just clarify the details.

2. Manifestations at the bodily level

This is about sweating, blushing, turning pale, breathing hard, etc. Thus, the whole body of a person resists untruth and refutes it. Plus adrenaline, plus the brain is trying hard to remember that the person is lying, so as not to get caught later.

2 and 3/4. The man mumbles, fusses, looks away

The body is still against deception, and therefore, on an unconscious level, a person experiences embarrassment and shame - hence the eyes on the floor, slurred speech and the desire to urgently occupy oneself with something (read “to escape from the battlefield”). Experienced liars, of course, do not give up their positions so easily, but this often happens with children.

3. Involuntary change in intonation

A person can speak as if inquiringly - he asks himself whether this is really so. Or exclaim for no reason (here is about nervousness). Or it can be extended and monotonous phrases, which I will talk about in the next paragraph. But the fact remains - intonation changes with and without reason, and the story itself turns into a nightmare of the speaker.

4. Changing the rate of speech

As a rule, a person speaks very quickly, but when he lies, speech slows down - every word is thought over, the thought process is at its maximum. Or vice versa - if a potential liar by nature speaks slowly and stretched out, then during a lie he scribbles like a machine gun. But it may well be that your interlocutor is simply agitated and he is eager to share some information with you.

5. Change of posture

For example, a person was sitting completely relaxed, but as soon as you started asking him about some reports that he has not been able to do for six months, he tenses, crosses his legs / arms, clenches his fists. Or if a person stood facing you, then he turns sideways and the whole body shows that he wants to leave - his feet are turned towards the door, etc.

6. The appearance of tremors in the voice

A trembling voice speaks of excitement, and the person who is lying or about to lie at the moment experiences it in one way or another, because "What if my lie is revealed" or "How he / she will react if he / she finds out that I am lying." At the moment of deception, a person is worried not because he is deceiving, but because he fears the consequences.

7. The appearance of pauses when answering questions

The appearance of pauses when answering questions that should not cause difficulties, and vice versa. Let's remember detective films and TV series. Who turns out to be the culprit? Yes, exactly the one who had a minute alibi ready. And why? Because a liar in most cases comes up with in advance what to lie, how to back up his words and how to make them concrete at all.

Well, ask any person on the street what he did last night? He will think for a couple of seconds, because he was not ready for such a question. But if he came up with, thought over and calculated his alibi, then he will begin a monologue for half an hour, braiding to him a blind grandmother-neighbor and her dachshund, who have definitely seen the liar all evening.

It is not worth saying that your husband, girlfriend or acquaintances are lying on the basis of only one attribute - evaluate it comprehensively. If at least three signs come up, then think about whether your interlocutor is so honest. Do not wave a saber and shout "Oh, you, you are a bad person, you are lying to me" rush into battle - talk calmly and constructively.

Yes, for all your arguments, a potential deceiver can find a thousand excuses, but only you can decide what to do next. Take a break, think about what you will do if you realize that you are being deceived? The main thing here is not to fall into self-flagellation "he / she is lying to me because I …". Remember, if a person cheated, it is his choice, not your fault