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Video: On The Boundaries In The Relationship "psychotherapist-client" - Relationships, Reviews
What about Bob?
- USA, 1991
- Director: Frank Oz
- Starring: Bill Murray, Richard Dreyfuss
We offer you to watch and discuss with a psychologist a comedy about a funny incident in the professional practice of a psychotherapist, which entailed not at all funny consequences
Leo Marvin is a successful psychotherapist, bestselling author, TV star … In his practice there are many successful cases, but then a patient named Bob crosses the threshold of his office. Bob Wiley is a difficult patient, and not only because of his own problems: he creates problems for the therapist himself.
Marvin dreams of a vacation and goes on vacation, but that was not the case. Bob drives after him, compulsively tries to penetrate his life, gets to know his family, establishes friendships with his wife, plays with his son and flirts with his daughter. As a result, the psychotherapist's life begins to go downhill and he himself has psychological difficulties.
The viewer is at a loss, it seems that Bob is behaving incorrectly and ungratefully, but he is so charming and sweet that it is difficult to get angry with him. Sorry for the psychotherapist, but! Was it his own mistakes that led to a string of problems?
Signs of a therapeutic relationship
The therapeutic relationship (contact between the therapist and the client) is deep, trusting, with psychological intimacy. Yes, it may seem that this is a close relationship, but they are fundamentally different from friendships or relatives.
The first sign
First, they are not symmetrical: the therapist knows the secrets of his client, and the client should not know any personal information about the specialist. The specialist's personal material will distort and influence psychological work. In addition, it will be more difficult for the client to trust him. When the client deals with a “psychotherapist” rather than a person, he is less afraid of assessment, he may be more open. This excludes something personal in the relationship. The help of a psychotherapist is a professional service.
Secondly, the relationship between the therapist and the client is governed by ethical rules. Personal contact, meetings outside of psychotherapeutic sessions should not be. Mixing personal and professional leads to disruption of the therapeutic process, therapy ceases to be effective and becomes overgrown with additional difficulties.
Love, friendship, companionship between the therapist and the client is unacceptable
And the film "What about Bob?" clearly shows why.
Learning to build boundaries
And in any other relationship, there must also be certain boundaries. No matter how close people are to each other, a symbolic border remains between them, each has its own symbolic space. For example, in a family, everyone has their own toothbrush.
Relationships without boundaries, contact-merging, are called symbiotic. The desire to build this type of contact speaks of infantilism, because this is how the relationship between a mother and a small child is arranged: one continuous compatibility and unity. Absolute coincidence in adulthood is impossible, and unnecessary. You can love a loved one, cherish him and at the same time set certain restrictions in communication: for example, at what hours it is convenient to call.