Interview: The Worst Scenario - Image

You are going for an interview and are afraid that you will be refused. The tongue becomes tangled, it is difficult to collect thoughts, sweat appears. First of all, you need to ask yourself "what could happen"? The worst scenario is if the HR manager says that he will contact you or immediately inform you that you are not suitable. Try to relive this moment, is it really that scary and worth such experiences?

Intrinsic motivation

The right attitude will help make the task easier. To live in harmony with oneself, a person needs not only the support of others, but also a positive self-esteem. It is important to approve of your actions. Imagine what happens a day after you refused to do the right thing. How will you feel if you succumb to fear now? Will you respect yourself?

Psychologist's advice: try to find your inner core - something that will help you take a step towards the unknown. Allow yourself not only to try, but also to fail: Usually, this internal resolution of error relieves the tension that prevents you from moving forward.

The rule of small steps

Fear is often the result of going out of your comfort zone. The secret to overcoming fear is to start small, rather than trying to solve the whole problem at once. Find a simple action you can do and follow through. After that, allow yourself to feel proud. Analyze your condition: how do you feel now? Ready to take the next little step?

Psychologist's advice: write down the upcoming case for a series of sequential actions. Don't think about the end result, focus on what you will be doing right now. For example, in the case of an interview, the first step might be to write a resume, the second to send it out, and so on. This will make sure that there is nothing to worry about in every step. Don't forget to compliment yourself after every step!

Borrowed experience

If it is difficult to deal with fear on your own, a simple transfer will help. Remember a cute, strong-willed, in some way similar to you character, who would really need the same thing as you. How would he behave in this situation? He is not held back by fears, he can do anything - and at the same time in the most effective way. If speed is needed, he acts quickly, if decisiveness - boldly. Try to imagine yourself as the chosen hero and act "on his behalf."

Psychologist's advice: Imagine that you are putting on a character's costume, and with it you acquire all those qualities that you need now. Further actions for you seem to be performed by another person, which allows you to turn on the protective mechanism and move away from your fears.

Don't let the fear of rejection prevent you from living a harmonious and fulfilling life!

EXPERT OPINION

I'm scared - it means I exist

“When I was scared as a child, I ran to my mother and clung to her:“Mom, I'm scared …”And she always knew what to say, what to do. At this moment, I understand this only now, I had a state of security.

Now, when I feel fear, when I am scared or scared of something, I know what to do. My "arsenal" of dealing with fear is different from my mother's. But there is also something in common. I prefer to face my fear. Look into his face. For this, fear, as a feeling, is important to realize, to feel it in the body. We all have our own bodily sensations, when I'm scared - I get cold inside. After that, I pronounce, sometimes even out loud, what scares me.

Are you afraid that you will be refused, will not accept a business proposal or will not be able to enter the circle of communication of people important to you? The technology for dealing with fear is the same as with other fears. Speak out your fears, it is at this moment that fear is appropriated. And then you can choose what to do - give yourself time to be with this feeling, “be afraid”. Or try to strengthen it - remember, as in childhood - "Oh, I'm afraid, I'm afraid." Each of us has his own way. The most important thing is not to deprive yourself of the opportunity to face your fears. Because fear very clearly shows that the situation is dangerous, alarming. If you always want to be afraid, try to escape your fear. If not, arrange a meeting with him - on your own or with the help of a psychologist.

Olga Dyachuk,

consultant psychologist, member of the Professional Psychotherapeutic League © Syda Productions / Photobank Lori