Table of contents:
- 1. The regime is changing
- 2. Husband does not help
- 3. No money because I am sitting at home
- 4. We have no helpers
- 5. This horror for life
Many young parents have no idea what they will face when they have a baby. The problems that arise with the birth of a child seem insignificant to many, but they require a quality solution.
1. The regime is changing
“But what about traveling, meeting friends, parties? Are we hermits now? "
With one child, all of this is still possible. You can take it with you on trips, to barbecue, to visit.
The problem of active parents who do not change their lifestyle with the appearance of their first child may be unwillingness to give birth to a second. It is already really difficult to carry two kids everywhere with you, the family automatically becomes more sedentary.
If there is agreement between husband and wife, then they will happily spend time with their families. And having agreed, they will be able to determine the days off for each other when mom can go alone to a beautiful meeting with her friends, to the theater, to a concert. Dad can also use his day off at his own discretion. It's important to let each other rest. One day a week - for everyone, on the other days - joint care of children. And if you manage to spend the weekend on the privacy of young parents, this will be the best solution.
2. Husband does not help
He comes home from work, lies down on the sofa and says that he is tired
Of course I'm tired. And you are tired. And there is no need to be silent and offended. Men generally do not tend to go where they are not asked. So go and ask - sit, feed, play while you lie in the bathroom, read a book or cross stitch. Ask without anguish and resentment, remind him that he is the same parent and bears the same responsibility, and you are a weak woman and are waiting for his help. A man wants to feel that he is needed.
3. No money because I am sitting at home
“I’m not used to asking someone for money, but you won’t go to work”
Firstly, in a family it is normal to take money from each other. Because the family. Of course, at the beginning of a life together, this is strange and unusual. Well, nowadays a lot of people make money online.
Search, think about what kind of work you can do from home. Articles, bookkeeping, skype consultations. Flip your usual way of thinking. After all, your life has also changed, and for the better! It is important for any woman that she feels like a socially active, full-fledged person, and not an aunt tortured by motherhood.
4. We have no helpers
“Grandmothers don't want to help us! And there is not enough money for a nanny … "
It happens. In the modern world, grandmothers work, live their own lives and are in no hurry to take care of their grandchildren, even on weekends. This is normal. It remains to be seen how you will behave when you become a grandmother.
The main thing here is to see all the advantages of the situation. On the one hand, they do not help, but on the other hand, they do not bring discord into the family with their view of upbringing, they do not stand between husband and wife, take sides in disputes, do not teach without request. This, incidentally, also applies to nannies. Everything that happens to your baby is in complete control.
5. This horror for life
“We will never be free. A child is forever! Horror!"
It will be hard at first, because he doesn't sleep well and needs to be fed at night. Make your life easier. There is no need to make heroic efforts and go somewhere to feed. Let the baby sleep with you for up to six months, in the best version - in his bed, pulled up to your bed. So you can put it with you while breastfeeding or give a bottle when artificial. In any case, your baby will feel that you are near and sleep peacefully.
Then it will be hard, because he will begin to move, grab and pull everything into his mouth. Make the environment safe. Remove the knives, tie or cover the lower kitchen drawers with special tools. The first aid kit should also be out of the reach of a child under 14 years of age. Hold up any small things that the child might choke on. All this will free up a lot of time for you, because there will be no need to run away with every rustle in fear that the child has hurt himself.
Don't show him unnecessary examples. Think about what your toddler sees, because babies are repetitive.
At two or three years old, the child will be able to go to kindergarten, and here you will breathe. The rest is a matter of education. Remember, all problems are solvable. This must be done without strain and resentment. Do not hesitate to ask for help, do not try to take everything upon yourself.
The appearance of a child turns the familiar world of young parents upside down, and you need to use this opportunity to turn your way of thinking, become more flexible, resourceful, get out of your comfort zone and enter a new stage of life with your baby - a higher quality, richer, more beautiful one. As the sages say - the more difficult, the more interesting.